Deli Meat Fan Pillows

"The bologna is locally sourced from the convenience store down the street."

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'

Baloneystini

"How about a little more coffee?"

"....and some apple pie for dessert...oh miss, remember that a la mode!"

"You know, it really wasn’t that bad."

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

"I'm a retired doctor."

'Sorry about that - Lenny accidentally used jumping beans.'

"Pecan pie with rum-raisin ice cream is the best revenge."

End of the day bargains at the cheese counter.

"I'm told the omelettes here have a broader purpose."

'Mary, watch where you're pointing that thing!'

Warming hands over soup.

Carnegie Deli

'The waitress gave us a weird look. On the way back, I'd better drive and you can stick your head out the window.'

The Deli Counter

'Your meal should be along shortly. Frank just went out to hunt it.'

"Everything bagel?"

"We think it sort of brightens up the breakfast."

Lovingly Handmade Sandwiches

101 Placenta Recipes

Deli/Antiques: Got Shrimp? Got Gout?

"Hey, Merle, table 8 wants ham and eggs. . . Errr. . . chocolate!"

'Red meat is bad for you.' 'No, red meat is not bad for me. Green meat is bad for me!'

'How's your liver?', 'Okay for now, but my doctor told me to take it easy.'

"Night, owl!"

'I'll have a dozen custard pies as well, please!'

'They describe the end of the ice age as the 'Big Brownout'. They lost more than 10,000 pounds of mammoth steaks.'

Three pigs sit down to eat roast wolf