Meat Fanatic Pillows

'How would you like your steak?' 'Big.'

Counting ribs

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

'Steak Ted?'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

"Rump roast?"

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

Important Food Groups

'We'll never be able to eat it all before it spoils -- how about a rabbit or something instead?'

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

"It's good to know she was butchered for a noble cause."

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

6,000 BC: Neolithic Barbecue

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

Butcher's shop has 'Cuts of salami' sign: End, Middle, Other End.

Cow of BEEF

Fountain of Youth/Fountain of Bacon

A butcher announcing he will kill his own meat

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

Platter confusion.

"I'll see your Sirloin and raise you a New York Strip."

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

"We get all our meat from a man dressed like a butcher."

Would you mind putting the barbecue out?

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

A convenient attack of swine flu...

"I only recommend the 24 oz. Prime rib for big fat guys."

'Beef Counselor - mad cow, foot and mouth, diet, nutrition, ethics'

'A lovely day, a good meal, and, thank heaven, no guilt.'

"I was hoping Calvin would grow up to be top sirloin..."

"Hmmm... what would Scooby Doo?"