Degree Seeker Gifts

'Look, Mom. I O.D.'d.'

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

Fear/Knowledge

'Never mind inspiration. I need background material on atomic physics.'

Eternal Student.

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

The Bookworm

"Teach yourself what you don't know you don't know."

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

Historical memory is on life support.

"Pssst! Do you have anything on American history?"

"Make a lot of money."

Continuing education.

Interdisciplinary studies.

Do your research!

'Great news, Dear! I've been traded to a think tank in California for a PhD Specializing in the Baltics!'

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

Exam

'Another football scholarship offer?'

"Miss Rogers told me I have a personal 'cloud' to store knowledge in."

"Eat not of the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge. Its sources have yet to be verified."

Back to school.

Procrastinator Foumdation: 'We're putting off the decision to fund you for at least another month...'

Man practising karate is tempted by a glass of beer.

The intellectual.

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

Bribes for Jabs

Booster shots

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

Screen Time vs Book Time