Deduction Dabbler Gifts

"Do you want to do that hilarious thing where we read the itemized deductions and then say 'in bed'?"

"I appreciate your devices that make it seem like you're paying attention, but could you actually pay attention and make eye contact so I know you are?"

'Let's go and make some unfunded spending committments.'

Socially distanced sledding

Chief Foreign Policy Advisor to President Obama.

'Thou shall not covet the neighbours same sex partner.'

'The crystal ball says to buy and the 8-Ball says to sell.'

'When the school upgraded its operating system, for the third time, I upgraded my headache medicine from over-the-counter to prescription strength.'

"I just finished a 10-day cleanse. Now it's time to retox."

The Screeeen!

'I can't get the hang of this cloud computing...'

'When did 'At Ease' become 'Chill'?'

'I don't surf the net, I just kind of dog-paddle through it.'

Negotiations over the new colour scheme had reached stalemate.

'I can't decide whether to get a lawyer or tell the truth.'

"How can you study while listening to music and TV at the same time?"

"When I evolve I'm going to be an elephant."

'If we are to differentiate ourselves from the private sector we need to focus on a reorientation of our client-facing interactions to prioritise customer led positive responses to intervention scenarios.'

'What was the question?'

'He's at the 'awkward stage' in converting to paperless so he carries both a laptop and a briefcase.'

Poor Holiday Gift Choice...The Lucifer 2500, Talking GPS Device.

Driving school car has sign on the rear; 'How's my learning?'

'Edwards, you fool, I'm Dr.Blake - the experiment worked! It means riches and fame for me - us! I meant us!'

"Done already?" "Yeah. I'd hate to get too sexy. I don't want to distract the airplanes flying overhead."

"I'm scanning these old photos we're afraid of losing into my computer so I can lose them there."

A knitter's in and out boxes

'I hate his more-contagious-than-thou attitude!'

'I would like to be able to refer to this statistical graph, but I have math anxiety.'

Dr. Reynolds finally realizes what he puts his patients through as he and his wife look at paint swatches.

'She's system two and this is the new beta release.'

'Awhile back I wouldn't tell what I read. I'm ready now...I read Tea Leaves.'

'Last week I offered to bring Bixby into the decision-making process, and he's still dithering about it!'

'It's just a first draft.'

Riddle behind the mask

'Just ignore your father - he's been dabbling in the occult again....'