Driving Dabbler Gifts

Driving school car has sign on the rear; 'How's my learning?'

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

"I appreciate your devices that make it seem like you're paying attention, but could you actually pay attention and make eye contact so I know you are?"

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

'I don't think he's so smart. I had to show him three times before he got the hank of it.'

"Next time don't use a herbed vinegar."

'Thou shall not covet the neighbours same sex partner.'

Chief Foreign Policy Advisor to President Obama.

'The crystal ball says to buy and the 8-Ball says to sell.'

My first mistake.

"Norman's really into wild paddling."

'When the school upgraded its operating system, for the third time, I upgraded my headache medicine from over-the-counter to prescription strength.'

DIY Shelves

The Screeeen!

'I can't get the hang of this cloud computing...'

"That's not all I do. Actually I'm a psychological counselor- gymnast-motivational speaker-relaxation therapist-sex worker."

'I don't surf the net, I just kind of dog-paddle through it.'

'I can't decide whether to get a lawyer or tell the truth.'

'If we are to differentiate ourselves from the private sector we need to focus on a reorientation of our client-facing interactions to prioritise customer led positive responses to intervention scenarios.'

"How can you study while listening to music and TV at the same time?"

'What was the question?'

"But part of me hopes there never is an Armageddon."

Poor Holiday Gift Choice...The Lucifer 2500, Talking GPS Device.

'Yes, been meaning to call maintenance to put up that shelf for ages now...'

Two men talking in front of half finished driveway. 'Your wife did mention you'd had an economy drive.'

'He's at the 'awkward stage' in converting to paperless so he carries both a laptop and a briefcase.'

'Edwards, you fool, I'm Dr.Blake - the experiment worked! It means riches and fame for me - us! I meant us!'

"I'm scanning these old photos we're afraid of losing into my computer so I can lose them there."

'I hate his more-contagious-than-thou attitude!'

"He's finally installing our security system."

"Done already?" "Yeah. I'd hate to get too sexy. I don't want to distract the airplanes flying overhead."

'I would like to be able to refer to this statistical graph, but I have math anxiety.'

Dr. Reynolds finally realizes what he puts his patients through as he and his wife look at paint swatches.

'It's just a first draft.'

'She's system two and this is the new beta release.'