Deductible Detective Gifts

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

A boy acting suspiciously

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

* For latent content, see your psychiatrist.

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'

"It seemed like a long timeout."

'Let's go home and come back next year. It's Ground Hog Deficit!'

Unusual Offers

"This pesky decimal point seems to give you quite a bit of trouble."

'Don't you think it's time you did something about the draught in here?'

'Okay... now everyone smile and say: 'that;s not deductible'.'

'But what do you sell?'

'Nothing this week †between your pay and your deductions, you broke even.'

Cut-Rate Think Tanks - Now available for hire.

It's always the same dream. I'm in therapy, analyzing my recurring dream.

'My school has a very strict detention policy.'

Good Cop, Bad Clown: 'Ok, ok I'll tell you what you want! Just make that creepy clown stop staring at me!'

"Bad debts, yes, but you can't deduct bad trips."

"I thought it was a breakthrough, but it was only a misplace decimal."

'...and then you smile and say...all together now...'that's not deductible.'.'

"When the IRS sees your deductions they'll get a good laugh!"

"Do me a favor, Harlow. When you greet me, stop saying 'Hello, big spender!'"

After income tax, pension and national insurance I end up owing £450.

"The $350 we received to stimulate the economy is still missing..."

Man sells IRS insurance outside IRS building.

Think Zero Defects

'It's a simple change. Instead of software, you should be writing off your employees as hardware.'

'My theory is he's faking sleep in order to get the $50 for the study.'

"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."

For latent content, see your psychiatrist.

"Have I met my deductible yet?"

"I drive to work every day. Those are business trips, aren't they?"