Deductible Detective Pillows

I'm glad Twig's injuries aren't serious. Even so, her emergency room visit was $972. The good news is we've got health care. There's bad news. The deductible is $1,500. That's no so bad. One more accident and we can collect! Teddy! Got a job for you!

A boy acting suspiciously

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

* For latent content, see your psychiatrist.

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'

"It seemed like a long timeout."

'Let's go home and come back next year. It's Ground Hog Deficit!'

"This pesky decimal point seems to give you quite a bit of trouble."

Unusual Offers

'Don't you think it's time you did something about the draught in here?'

'Okay... now everyone smile and say: 'that;s not deductible'.'

'But what do you sell?'

'Nothing this week †between your pay and your deductions, you broke even.'

Cut-Rate Think Tanks - Now available for hire.

It's always the same dream. I'm in therapy, analyzing my recurring dream.

'My school has a very strict detention policy.'

Good Cop, Bad Clown: 'Ok, ok I'll tell you what you want! Just make that creepy clown stop staring at me!'

"I thought it was a breakthrough, but it was only a misplace decimal."

He's mumbling again! What do you think husbands dream about?

"Bad debts, yes, but you can't deduct bad trips."

'...and then you smile and say...all together now...'that's not deductible.'.'

"Do me a favor, Harlow. When you greet me, stop saying 'Hello, big spender!'"

"When the IRS sees your deductions they'll get a good laugh!"

After income tax, pension and national insurance I end up owing £450.

Man sells IRS insurance outside IRS building.

"Wake up, Jane! There's a giant talking squirrel at the end of your bed!"

"The $350 we received to stimulate the economy is still missing..."

Think Zero Defects

'It's a simple change. Instead of software, you should be writing off your employees as hardware.'

"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."

'My theory is he's faking sleep in order to get the $50 for the study.'

For latent content, see your psychiatrist.

"I drive to work every day. Those are business trips, aren't they?"