Decor Drama Enthusiast Gifts

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

Non-Drip Paint

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"Want me to talk to the squirrel's mother, or would you prefer to handle it on your own?"

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

Posh Easter Egg

Doulton Canada Geese

This is the first time I've been on the top management floor.

King Madras

"Let me call you back, Lori. I'm binge-watching John clean the gutters."

"Dave, we need to talk about office props and work productivity."

'Yes,I did bag him from a treestand.How did you guess?'

Robotic Flower Arranging

"We need to talk."

Man who has called of his engagement because his fiancée did not match his furniture.

'Happens every year - I can never remember where I put the tree decorations.'

"You've done an absolutely fabulous job with the house, Anne, and Gordon's so improved!"

Man in traffic jam watches couple row while eating popcorn.

'They had a sale on electric green.'

"Would our big tacky objects look good here?"

'Sorry Gav, it takes more than a wet shirt to look like Mr Darcy.'

'No, I wouldn't like a free quote for central heating! Where did you get this number?'

'The old one fell apart.'

"Norman, let's lend out the Olmec head."

Antique silver

'I don't know much about art, but I know what I like.'

"Their entire planet is coated in things called doodads, tchotchkes, trinkets, knick-knacks, bric-a-brac, and clutter."

'We couldn't agree on the wallpaper.'

Mistress Talking to Maid

"I've been researching a little furniture company that I'd like to rearrange."

'Edwin, I hop you'll come home in a good mood. The decorators hung the new wallpaper today.'

''Midnight in Paris' didn't work in the conference room. Let's try something more vibrant like 'Sunrise Over Wall Street.''