Decor Diehard Gifts

Non Drip Paint

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"Surprise!"

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

"I love these old decorations!"

'I'd like to match this credenza.'

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"It keeps it out of sight when we're not watching it."

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

Posh Easter Egg

Doulton Canada Geese

"Dave, we need to talk about office props and work productivity."

This is the first time I've been on the top management floor.

King Madras

Santa's Party Trick - mishap with decoration juggling.

"Hang on- I'm receiving a textured message."

'Yes,I did bag him from a treestand.How did you guess?'

Robotic Flower Arranging

"This one will go with everything,

"We need to talk."

'The holidays are about to be thrust upon us, Edgar, are you prepared?'

Man who has called of his engagement because his fiancée did not match his furniture.

"Room for bigger presents."

"You've done an absolutely fabulous job with the house, Anne, and Gordon's so improved!"

Flower lamp.

'Happens every year - I can never remember where I put the tree decorations.'

'They had a sale on electric green.'

"Would our big tacky objects look good here?"

'The old one fell apart.'

'I've spent the last 20 years modernising the house and now you say it looks old-fashioned!'