Deck Chair Royal Gifts

"Surprise!"

'How about a game of cards?'

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

'That strange smell, George.. is FRESH AIR!'

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

'I told you I'd deal with your transfer request, Jenkins. Cut the deck!'

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'

'Why is it that as soon as the sun comes out the flies come out too.'

"I don't know why I'm here - I don't need a haircut."

It says, you're going to meet a nice Pisces for a romantic dinner.

'Well, how do I know you're not sitting on a deck chair?'

Calm in the Face of Chaos

Football Royalty

Pharaoh on the toilet.

'The Ben Franklin? What an honor! I see your 'Poor Richard's Almanack' in bathrooms all over the place!'

"#*@!% #*@!% #*@!%"

Naval Power of England and France

'I love working with my hands.'

Old Men On Rockers Sneeze and Fall Over.

Beach Day

Man relaxing in a deckchair at the campsite

'TWO crowns? - I'd say you definitely have delusions of grandeur.'

He had the idea after visiting the aquarium.

'Hey! I didn't ask to be king - I had it thrust upon me!'

When Chairs Attack

'Mother's visiting next week, so I'd like you to lock up all the dissidents.'

'I'm pretty sure I never said I wanted a 'Bouncy' castle.'

'Well, you DID know this job was dangerous when you took it.'

THE PLAYBOY CHANNEL. 'I have to get my mind off politics somehow!'

'I see you've got Billy scrubbing the decks again.'

"For my birthday I asked my husband for something with diamonds... He bought me a pack of cards..!"

BRINGGGG!, 'I TOLD you to turn off your cell phone!'

A sailor refusing to give up his alcohol.

'A man in uniform? Well we've got two Park-Keepers, six Traffic-Wardens and a Deck-Chair Attendant' (at a dating agency).

Man on deck being spied on.