Debt Decoders Gifts

"According to his will, he wants his outstanding debts to be shared equally between the three of you."

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

'Very well, I'll introduce you. Ego, meet ID. Now get back to work.'

Practical loans vs. devil-may-care loans.

Eurobonds Explained.

'You might show a little excitement at the figures, Johnson!'

Paw readings

"I asked my friends over to see how much the adults are leaving us to pay off!"

Information vs. confusion

'Sheisse ... What ein dream!' - Freud

'...just robbing peter to pay paul...what's up with you?'

"If you have to ask, you can't afford it."

"I dreamed last night that I was furious at you for charging me for missing last week's session. What do you think it means?"

'I FEEL YOUR PAIN!'

What comes after a trillion

"I don't see much borrowing on your credit report but I do see a lot of begging and stealing."

Market Research - "I'm trying to remember to pick up a loaf of bread, but there's a 38% probability that I'll forget."

Euro crisis bailout.

'Cancel your debt? How do you think I make my money?'

'Can you believe this bank...? Yesterday they refuse me a loan, today they send me a leaflet for a loan.'

"Well, yes, I suppose I could explain the test results in 'plain English' — but then you'd know how sick you are."

Abraham Lincoln sends his first bill - Three score dollars and ten.

"One day more boy, all this will be yours!"

'I hope you are not playing God again . . .'

'Well, your income looks good, and you've been on your job for over two years... but it seems you're 15 trillion dollars in debt.'

"The doctors call it Polymyositis, but I call it 'Military Arthritis' because it comes with a lot of fatigue."

"White House sources indicate China has called in the US debt."

"I had the strangest dream. I was suddenly in a room full of people, and I didn't have a stitch on."

Loan trap

Siggy