Debt Decoders Pillows

"According to his will, he wants his outstanding debts to be shared equally between the three of you."

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

What Guys Say and What They Mean,

'Very well, I'll introduce you. Ego, meet ID. Now get back to work.'

Practical loans vs. devil-may-care loans.

'You might show a little excitement at the figures, Johnson!'

Paw readings

Eurobonds Explained.

'Stocks shot up. . . no one on the committee could understand a word that Bernanke was saying.'

"I asked my friends over to see how much the adults are leaving us to pay off!"

Horror Theater. Now Playing. Return of the Deficit.

Information vs. confusion

'Sheisse ... What ein dream!' - Freud

'...just robbing peter to pay paul...what's up with you?'

"Wow! Even from space the Italian mountain of debt is visible!"

What comes after a trillion

"I dreamed last night that I was furious at you for charging me for missing last week's session. What do you think it means?"

'I FEEL YOUR PAIN!'

"I don't see much borrowing on your credit report but I do see a lot of begging and stealing."

"If you have to ask, you can't afford it."

Market Research - "I'm trying to remember to pick up a loaf of bread, but there's a 38% probability that I'll forget."

Euro crisis bailout.

'Can you believe this bank...? Yesterday they refuse me a loan, today they send me a leaflet for a loan.'

'Cancel your debt? How do you think I make my money?'

Abraham Lincoln sends his first bill - Three score dollars and ten.

"Well, yes, I suppose I could explain the test results in 'plain English' — but then you'd know how sick you are."

"One day more boy, all this will be yours!"

'Well, your income looks good, and you've been on your job for over two years... but it seems you're 15 trillion dollars in debt.'

'I hope you are not playing God again . . .'

"White House sources indicate China has called in the US debt."

"The doctors call it Polymyositis, but I call it 'Military Arthritis' because it comes with a lot of fatigue."

"I had the strangest dream. I was suddenly in a room full of people, and I didn't have a stitch on."

Loan trap

Siggy