Death Metal Fan Pillows

Existential Risk

"I wonder what ever became of those cute little umbrella swizzle-sticks."

"Hurry up! - You don't have all day. . ."

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

Transylvanian backpackers.

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

Silence of the Chickens...

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"

"Apparently the Ebola virus can make your ears bleed."

Frankenstein's Monster's PC.

Open House of Horrors

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

"There's a loose string on your sweater, dear, but I'm afraid to pull it."

Monsters looking for a new bed to move under.

Zombie Problems

Frankenstein's Reading Light

'Regular or decapitated?'

Gypsy curses didn't seem so threatening after the Mummy went into the peg business.

Grim Reaper Snack Bar

"Now make sure your heat is high enough to sear your putrid meat quickly."

"OSHA is going to hear about this!"

'And so you can imagine our surprise when we discovered our hall closet was the gateway to hell!'

"Oh, Irwin, I wish to god you'd get rid of that thing!"

"I feel like I'm persecting."

"Excuse me, do you folks believe in ghosts?"

"That's a zombie, alright. But he's the worst kind. He doesn't eat brains, he eats data."

Little Van Helsing was dissapointed that, again, there was no monster under the bed or in the closet.

A portrait comes alive and stabs its artist

"Meow...."

"Are we going with scary clown? Or just plain old spooky?"

Vampire Umbrella

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Macula'.

"We got your bloodwork back, it doesn't appear to be yours."