Death Industry Gifts

"Engraving is $25 per character......thirty plus characters, and the Emoji is free."

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

'Unforeseeable future site of Hainesmore Industries.'

"Apparently the Ebola virus can make your ears bleed."

Tata: Goodbuy or Goodbye?

"Back in the industrial age, this was, I believe, a steel mill."

'Here it is - the world's largest miniaturization plant.'

'We're cutting you some slack because you just died but normally we frown on devil's food.'

"Take no notice, Blendie, it's just Brent, being his usual, crude..."

'Your prescription is ready. How would you like to finance it?'

'Well, Mr. Harris, I'm afraid you simply care too much. You have compassion fatigue.'

Coal Liquefaction Plant...Liquefied Coal Gasification Plant

"Just to be clear, you want suicide doors installed on your hearse?"

"Rate your experience and you could win an Amazon gift voucher."

Undertaker's Flower Box.

'All those in favour of accepting more robots?'

'What the hell is PIG IRON?'

"Some day son, all this will belong to your ex-wives."

"Manufacturing will take place in China, R&D in Korea, customer support will be run from Mumbai and logistics handled in Vietnam."

"And I suppost you've never had a friendly wager with a colleague?"

"Our carbon footprint has been very, very good to us."

"You fool! This isn't embalming fluid, this is my coffee."

'It appears more and more people are working at home these days.'

'I have to charge a lot for an office visit. How do you think I pay for MY health insurance?'

"Now there's one less conspiracy theorist in the world - or is there?"

"And they say this country doesn't make anything anymore!"

Pork Lift

"You'll be out of here before you know it. Our auditor just went over your financial situation."

'He only has six weeks to live, so make sure his bill is due at the end of the month.'

"I'm worried about Junior... all he wants to do is kill things."

"It's little Pharma. Want some baby aspirin?"

"Recovery involves elements of faith. So let's pray my billing service, this hospital and your insurance provider all work smoothly together."

"Well if you don't agree with my count, then you do it."

'Your fear of being replaced by automation is a legitimate fear and one I would share, were I not, myself an automation.'

Road kill - Foreign competition beating US auto domination.