Dealing With Relationship Changes Pillows

"Maybe the best way we can make Mom see she's too old to have a boyfriend that young is to tell her he's a grape and she's a raisin."

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

Relationship counselor: 'She started behaving strangely, and our man-machine interface has become unpredictable.'

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

'Great Therapy!'

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

'Come on, you can make it work! You're supposed to be Lovebirds after all...'

"We don't talk anymore."

'Well I wouldn't have to fake orgasms if you didn't fake foreplay!'

'This marriage is turning into a complete farce.'

"What do you mean?! That apology is the best piece of fiction I've ever written!"

'You think it's easy, being married to a man who thinks of nothing but his work?'

Their relationship was doomed to fail. She was frigid, and his arms were too short to rub one out.

"I fell in love with her. Then she mutated."

"I think I'm as patient as the next person, but my husband wouldn't stop saying 'yo,' so I shot him."

Snow White and her husband go for counselling.

DIY marriage counseling.

"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."

Relationship Issues.

Worm Bed

Well, if being married isn't grounds for divorce, I'd like to know what is"

"Your mind is somewhere else." "My mind is somewhere else."

"See how controlling he is?!"

"But honey. . . he's just not our kind!"

"I feel I'm losing touch with the unrealistic view I have of him."

'You do make me laugh, Ron, but a relationship can't survive on laughter alone.'

"She may be awhile. Her mother's helping her park."

Couple beyond prayer - need divine intervention.

'The wife says if I don't give up snooker, she's leaving me. . .I'm going to miss her.'

'We were so attracted to each other - now we're just poles apart'

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