Day Off Enjoyer Gifts

'It's been a pretty slow day -- What say we knock off a couple hours early?'

Police Feline Unit

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

Lazy Octopus

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

American Idle.

Cat and mouse

Bill and Lester have a 'Hay Day'.

To be honest, I'd just as soon as lay in the yard, but he so looks forward to it.

Shellfie

'Some dogs are meant to be working dogs and some aren't.'

'The the President we've gone surfin', surfin' U,S,A,'

Catatonic

'Can you mow the lawn? The kids can't find their trampoline.'

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

"Would you get me a beer from the refrigerator? Just grab one of the cans on the top shelf. Come on, I do so much for you—all these years, the walks, the food, the chases... Come on! Never mind."

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

'The great thing about sloth is you can't be blackmailed for it.'

'I've never known a dog who gets tired so quickly.'

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.

"I'm going to tell them our number one way to be stress-free is taking a day off to go fishing."

'If it's a universal remote, how come it doesn't work on the refrigerator?'

How the goat got square eyes.

"Do you want to order in or wither and die?"

'Ah, business as usual.'

Dribbling and snoring - proof that men can multi-task.

"It's days like this that make me glad I became a teacher."

"When you're finished with your Thanksgiving

'Some blue-arsed fly you turned out to be.'

'Don't get up. ... I've got it!'

Inactive wear store.

'I told him we're becoming an endangered species. He just laughed.'

'I load on the job all the time so I figure it's not really 'earned' income.'