Dating Scene Explorer T-Shirts

'It's me. Just checking to see if the phone number you gave me was real.'

"He's been married before but he has excellent blue book value."

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

'It is so nice going out with a man who isn't weird.'

"Oh, it's you Jane. I didn't recognize you standing up."

"I just love a nice knight out."

Camel Personal Ads

'What I'm about to say, Miss Pomeroy, may shock and disgust you....'

Cyclops makes the mistake of winking at a girl in a singles bar

'Watch your step -- She keeps an undated marriage license in her purse.'

"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"

Chick Magnet

"Careful Suzie, don't get too fresh. They might try to follow us upstream!"

"I asked her if she wanted to go to dinner. She said yes and then she went to dinner."

"Guess what I'd like to disappear?."

"Y'see - I'm what you'd call a 'new man...'"

"You want to check out my crib?"

Northern chat up lines: 'You don't sweat much for a fat lass'

"You're asking me out. I don't know you from you."

'A penny for your thoughts. Fifty bucks for your panties.'

Do you fear early baldness, Rolf? I have a greater fear of cocktail-hour baldness. That's when I try to pick up women in bars.

Happy hour wraps up here at seven o'clock ... coincidentally, that's when it begins at my apartment.

I take my marital status the way I take my malt whiskey: single. ? ?

"I've been told that moonlight becomes me, and that pitch darkness becomes me even more."

"Hi!- standards need lowering?"

"So, … do you prefer possum or opossum?''

"Normally I like men who talk with their hands."

"Whaddaya say we skip the introductions, marriage, kids, and you just cut me a check right now?"

"I hope you won't be offended if I tell you that you have the classic American face."

"To be honest, I'm not looking so much to connect as to segue."

"She's just being Koi."

Online Dating

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

That must be my computer date... (Answers door to robot).

"Why don't you move over here, Mr. Lowery, where you'll be closer to everything."