Dating Escapade Fan Gifts

'Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.'

"Well, this is me."

"She's just being Koi."

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

"Good evening, I'm your date. Let me begin by saying I'm sorry I'm late, I'm sorry I'm bald and I'm sorry I'm short."

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

'Don't look now but it's that guy from Pennsylvania that you dumped,'

Newly married couple on a magic carpet.

"Is this your first time with an undercover cop?"

"The date was a disaster: he grew up with pirates you see, so I couldn't understand half of what he was saying..."

"In a world of beefcake, I'm dating tofu."

"He said he was a dog person so I dated him, but he was secretly a cat person."

"Sorry, but I never get a girls name tattooed, on a first date!"

'Oh, those are just for show. We don't have electricity.'

"Same old, same old, men seem intimidated by a strong woman..."

"If there's one thing this business has taught me...it's the vital importance of dotting the 'i's' and crossing the 't's' to make sure you're protected against ALL contingencies!"

'Well I struck out that time. She says she doesn't drink.'

Duncan made a real faux pas when he heard that his blind date was expecting a baby.

'Yep! She said the corner of 'get lost' and 'never' at midnight.'

Give that woman a Pink Squirrel! Give that man a black eye.

'I finally met a macho, self-assured, good-looking guy, and wouldn't you know it? - He's doing thirty years to life!'

"If you won't let me pay for dinner, at least let me pay for sex later."

"Not tonight, dear. I have a head injury."

'Oh sure, Rupert's lovely, but his mate's a total slime-bag.'

'I'm not playing hard to get. I'm a lesbian.'

OK, I'm a little shallow, but I'm meaningful.

'Got any women repellent?'

The only time sparks flew on my date with this guy was when the muffler shook loose from his junky car.

A young man creating an awkward silence

I'm in a quandary, Ann. On the one hand, I was hoping to have "the most fun you can have without laughing" tonight. On the other hand, this being a comic strip, going for laughs is the whole idea. What would Beetle Bailey do?

"During a single week in New York we got robbed three times and Henry got shot!"

Mona Lisa in a bar: 'Forget it, Ted...she's way out of your league!'

'I'll just ring mother to see if I'm free to take you out on Saturday.'

"But that's enough about me. What about you?"