Dating Escapade Admirers Gifts

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

"You don't know me well enough to not care how I look."

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

"We met through the personals. We both were seeking someone 'Rubenesque'."

"You lack spontaniety."

Dating - "Oh, and she must have a sense of humour."

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

"Mine says this relationship will never work out and I should dump you right now!"

"Yes, he was very nice, Mom, but he had to cut the date short because it was... 'report card time'!"

"What's the problem? I said dinner and a movie."

'He had bulging muscles and a wallet to match!'

Biological Cuckoo clock

"I'm experiencing bouts of heavy breathing and dizziness when I'm speed dating!"

Man and woman on donkeys at the beach

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

Ostrich Bar

"Ideally, I'm looking for a guy who can make me smile."

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

'You remind me of my ex-ex-ex.'

'Are you ready to get hurt again?'

Women's Idea of Sharing/Men's Idea of Sharing.

"It's funny how people suddenly come out of the woodwork when they know you're taken."

When kissing a woman, try not to burp.

Alligator Bars

A Tree Grows In . . . Wherever.

"I've become so good at dating—relationships that used to take months now last a matter of days."

Two bedbugs after a tryst.

"Yes, we met on a blind date, or in your father's case, a blind drunk date."

"What if I dress up like a Chihuahua?"

'And that m'lord concludes the case for the defence. . . '

"Ask me anything you want about Water Cress!"

"We pointed, but we never clicked."