Dating Agency Staff Gifts

Dating Service: 'Dang Cursed again with manliness'

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

'You're in luck - we do have a temporary position in advertising'.

'Sorry, this isn't that kind of agency. We determine the age of old fossils, not arrange dates for them.'

'Hey...here's a hot prospect...likes catching frisbees, chasing squirrels, rolling in smelly stuff...'

'-but I keep telling you-these things take time...'

'Top is right! He's a scaffolder working on a tower block'

"Take the goldfish. If it's still alive in six months, call us for another interview."

Overly wordy travel.

"We've checked, and it's fine with women."

'I've never read such stupid twaddle in all my life, I like it'

'How do you like your egg?'

'I won't rule out using sex as a weapon, but I do have a 'no first use' policy.'

"You may 'have a thing for Earth women' Mr. Zing. But I'm afraid we don't have any on our files that express a similar interest in Venusian men."

Carbon Dating Agency

'I'll tell you a joke; I lied about the GSOH!'

The Russians build another wall.

Mister, Inc: 'Wrong...Right'

'I like to think our false and deceptive advertising is falser and more deceptive than anyone else's false and deceptive advertising.'

"I see they've privatised the fostering and adoption service."

'Love and affection, loyalty, big brown eyes. Yes, we've got just the thing for you.'

I am sorry you can't have Sonia,she is for display only.'

'Your blind date reminded you of a TV star?, 'Yeah -- I think he was wearing Columbo's raincoat.'

Just Another Brick In The Wall, temporary workers.

'You are neither tattooed, nor pierced, or have facial hair - how creative can you be?'

'I think I would get along really well with someone as disagreeable as me.'

'I'm not supposed to say this, but I think you'd be better off with a cat.'

"I told the dating service I hated the bar scene. I suppose you did, too."

'They couldn't exactly get me a date, but they offered me a job as a practice dummy.'

Temporary Worker Bee

"I'm available every day except one."

'I'd like to go to the one most deserving'

EMPLOYMENT AGENCY, 'While my reserve unit was guarding the Iraqi border, an illegal alien took my job.'