Dating Agency Professional Pillows

'How do you like your egg?'

Carbon Dating Agency

"You may 'have a thing for Earth women' Mr. Zing. But I'm afraid we don't have any on our files that express a similar interest in Venusian men."

"I'd like to meet someone in their 70s or 80s, preferably with a terminal illness!"

"Do you have any of those books that understand men?"

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

You can fool some of the people all of the time - "Send in some of the people, Dorothy."

Boyfriend of the Month.

CATCHY NAME

The Stages of Wine

Let's not do anything we'll regret in the morning. I like to sleep past noon.

'Sorry, this isn't that kind of agency. We determine the age of old fossils, not arrange dates for them.'

'Hey...here's a hot prospect...likes catching frisbees, chasing squirrels, rolling in smelly stuff...'

I couldn't resist his pickup line. He said he had a job.

"I'm from the Duvall Executive Search Agency, and I leave no stone unturned."

'Standing on tiptoe waving your claw may attract a crab, but it certainly doesn't woo me.'

'Top is right! He's a scaffolder working on a tower block'

'Wow!... Look at the personality on her!'

"Not so fast, Casanova! I want to get to know a man and his intentions better before I allow him to accompany me to the cinema!"

'If you want to get anywhere with girls, you gotta PRETEND to like bunnies, ponies, and kittens.'

Tom prepares for his hot date.

Small Talk

The singles bar...

'Well thank you Igor!! I spend all night making small talk with the blonde and Mr. googly eyes has to show up!!'

"I'm a simple man, really."

'I won't rule out using sex as a weapon, but I do have a 'no first use' policy.'

Babe magnet

'No thanks! Playing doctor is how my folks ended up getting married.'

Mister, Inc: 'Wrong...Right'

'I'm very good at what I do...as long as what I do is being overpaid.'

"My name is Adam and your name is Eve and that I think is a good starting point for a relationship between us!"

'I'll tell you a joke; I lied about the GSOH!'

Courtship display

Agency Honesty Day: 'I have no idea what I'm doing.'

"I'm still in recovery for my perfectionism."