Data Diving Enthusiast Gifts

"Profits lately have been spiraling downward."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

'Why can't you tell me you love me without all the charts and graphs?!'

'We're living in a round hole economy.'

"Peterson proposes we move out of the mountains."

"Well, either you're hopelessly optimistic or hopelessly short-sighted."

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

'On the plus side we've saved money by getting all the numbers on one graph.'

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

"Good invisible exports figures this quarter, sir."

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

'I like scientists: They are genuinely interested in every mundane thing we do and keep detailed records...'

Charities should investigate whether published reports are 'Misleadingly Positive'.

"I love your optimism."

'From an aesthetic perspective, it has heart, beauty and intrigue, but is it a viable process design?'

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

'The question is - to what level of data do we wish to stoop.'

"Daddy is off to work in a data mine."

'This graph may need some explaining...'

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

Us. Everyone else. My research shows that we are the only statistics company sill using pie charts displayed on an easel.

Bottom line, is that the sweet smell of success or your aftershave?

"There's a lot of uncertainty out there these days. Or not. Who knows?"

Real data visualization specialists are 100% committed to their profession.

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

'These latest figure are encouraging...'

Violent Crime Statistics

'Maybe we have the wrong subject for this brain mapping project.'

Aggression/Security