Data Disruptor Pillows

'Ok, I've hacked into the NHS. Elsie Bartle had two sore throats in 1973; where do we go with that kind of data?'

"Gosh, I can't believe it's been over 25 years since our company was dragged, kicking and screaming, into the digital age!"

"Here's what you wanted – a strategy to live abundantly, build capital, surpass your peers and disappoint your heirs."

'...and what's more, my databank has more data than your databank.'

"Another organization has already researched this, but I'm afraid that if we use it, we won't get as much credit."

Gun Control Rally

'before you say 'all this will be yours', I don't want it.'

"This is my last shift, I've been replaced by some bitch called Alexa."

Man painting over a computer screen.

'She wishes.'

"You majored in cyber hacking and institutional sabotage?. . . Hired!"

'You don't need to worry about your records being sold to the highest bidder...they'll bugger it and sell them off cheap!'

"Worst TED talk ever"

"You don't need to come in for any more check-ups . . . we can get most of your personal information off Facebook."

Shred-a Data - We shred into much smaller pieces.

'In future in addition to the usual access to customers address books, photographs and friends we'll want information on...'

"Look! It came pre-defaced by the artist."

Spoonfest

'I didn't know I was going to sneeze.'

Elon Musk

"We ran the big data through graphic analysis. That's when we realised that the whole world had been trolling us."

"I started up a startup to start up more startups."

The Unalphabetizer

Occupy crunch

Annoying computer user.

"Good morning, 555-00-6742, makes 73,000 a year, has 3 credit cards."

TV Kill

'Would you mind jumping in further down please?'