Dark Satire Lovers Gifts

Demonization: Fifth Horseman of the Apocalypse.

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."

'... And this is my cellar.'

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

'Now they're just taking the piss.'

"Nobody ever asked about my mental health."

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

Dead Funny

'The cash bonus incentives don't appear to be having the desired results. So, I've hired Rocky, here. He'll be providing the heads of the least productive departments with his own brand of incentive. If you know what I mean.'

"Just give me your wallet. Trust me, you do not want to deal with my misplaced sense of entitlement."

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

End the Winter Blues

"Needs to get a life"

"Where do you see yourself in 20 to 25 years?"

"Where is everyone?" "You had 'everyone' killed." "Stalin family reunion"

"Housekeeping?!"

Murder in Apartment 6-K

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

"It's such a beautiful day. Why don't we go out and get someone to eat?"

"O.K., time's up. Pencils down."

Pastries and Candy

"Congratulations, Trumpism. It's ot often we initiate a new horseman."

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

"I thought you wanted me to change."

"I can never remember - do these go in garbage or compost?"

Who gets the anti-corona vaccine?

"Puss in cement boots"

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

'Don't worry, you're safe. I started my diet today.'

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

Giant ape juggling planes and captive.