Danger Zone Aficionado Gifts

Safety last.

'I tell you what: If it weren't for the headrest, I would have serious whiplash right now...'

'So, how bad is it? Who can bring me up to speed?'

"Vernon likes an element of danger in a water feature..."

Memorable Travel Adventure: 'I was in Florida, and on a whim, decided to wrestle an alligator.'

'My horoscope says I'm due for a surprise today.'

Avalanche skiing is a RUSH!

"It's the Coast Guard - they want to know how many life-jackets we have onboard."

Crash test dummy employee of the month.

'The new intelligent dummies aren't working out. They've figured out there's a break!'

"Fasten your seat belt."

"It's called being preemptive."

'What went particularly well?'

Sailor notices a sea mine in his foot bath.

Drop dead gorgeous

Death By Mattress

Millwall - Hard Hat Area.

'Roger was home schooled, so it was only natural that he wound up working at home.'

Despite hard evidence to the contrary it was still considered lucky to kiss the Blarney Spike

The guardrail brings it up to code.

Pinocchio goes on holiday.

"How was your day, dear?"

'Quick! Play dead!'

"It's okay, honey. It's only a mailman."

"You see - this machine can cut your work force in half!"

'No, no, I've gone through all the steps in the procedure and I don't see anything about totally immersing yourself in oil before starting the job!!

'Inventions gone bad! Nuclear sparklers.'

'I think I may be an adrenaline junkie.'

'Just had to text and ride, didn't you?'

The Electric Fence Survivors Support Group

'Caution! Quick sand in this area.'

'They're a bit pricey, but on the other hand, I don't have to buy any baby gates.'

'Those are my best tights, don't you dare ladder them !'

Remember how you advised me to get a dangerous hobby to build up my self-esteem and impress people? Well, all the dangerous hobbies were already taken. You wrestle alligators … Armstrong skis down a pile of his money … Without a helmet. Even that ancient hag Sadie has a dangerous hobby. Every year, in violation of both common sense and local fire safety ordinances, the old lady lights all the candles on her birthday cake. I heard that!!! Fun fact: The 20th century was one of the most brutal in h

Safety First Cricket