Cynicism Connoisseurs Pillows

"The bad news is we'll go down in history as supporting the overthrow of an election. The good news is nobody reads history."

Unhappy man with 'rabbit-ear' fingers behind his head.

Plight of Decent-White-Male-Middle Class Scapgoats.

The Forever Stamp

"Boss, the customers can hear you cackling maniacally." "I've topped myself, minion." "It's not enough to run ads that tout our own excellence: we have to simultaneously tear down the competition." "Behold: my masterpiece." "'100 percent of those who drink Coffee King’s coffee will die.'" "Best part is it’s technically true."

"Right. Women adore him, men want to be like him, and YOU... well, you're hopeless. So, am I the ONLY one who sees through this guy?"

"Life sucks and then you keep living."

'Well, at least he's an honest politician.'

"At the end of the day it's just a sunset."

"They're at that age where it's only cool to wag ironically."

"He's a mental-health critic."

Bush vs. America

iDeasy

Federal Bureau of Do As We Say, NOT As We Do!

Bartender, there's a human finger in my beer. Today's comics readers are pretty jaded, sir. They're no longer shocked by a fly in a bowl of soup.

"Everyone is so cynical these days."

"At Ermbruster Academy you son will acquire indispensible life skills."

"Robust, full-bodied bouquet with just a hint of bitter, mean-spirited despair."

'Huh! Nobody home!'

"Let's see if we can't make an end run around basic human decency."

'No wonder people are cynical about government. Fooling some of the people all the time no longer works.'

If there's one thing I've learned, it's this: Never trust someone who tries to sell you nine life insurance policies.

"You seem to have the right combination of bitterness, pessimism, and caffeine consumption that we're looking for."

Sucking Up to Gen X

"Every complaint should be seen as a learning opportunity, today you’re going to learn where to hide them."

"Man, I'm sooooo bored!"

The Ekert Saga: '...A place where people are always unhappy no matter how well things are going? Ah! Got it...Go to Fenway Park in Boston.'

Information and Still don't get it.

"I started out looking for an honest man and settled for a guy with creative bookkeeping skills."

Corrupted Politicians

'At $12 a glass, I want it to spit out what it drank.'

Mail & Political lies.

"I've had a few days to calm down and process things and I've come to the realization that I was wrong to have had faith in humanity."

"He's our man. He's our guy. He lies less than those other guys!"

"I want a campaign that shows the brand's empathetic, inclusive and caring side - or you're all fired."