Cyberstalgia Gifts

"Sticks and stones may break my bones but tweets will never hurt me."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

'This is the only part of my old Army uniform that still fits.'

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

"Remember when we used to wonder if there other beings somewhere out there?"

'How do you like my two-tone car?'

"10th Anniversary Woodstock Reunion'

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

Before the Internet

"Desmond likes to live in the moment. . . and that moment happens to be 1960."

Hay Rides $10

"Yep, I've read this chapter before."

"Pardon me, Vito, but I'm holding the talking stick now."

'Bring out yer books!'

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"Hipsters"

Elvis Presley

'I met him on a Monday and my heart stood still (would you believe?)')

Gramophone dreams of mp3 player.

"Bleeeee! It's plastic."

That midnight hour when fleeting memories come home to roost.

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

"I remember him before he was getting hte winter fuel allowance."

Old rocker.

Those Were The Days

'Jerry's 'old school'.'

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

You had me at vintage.

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"Jack Daniels-in-a-box"