Cybersecurity Analyst Gifts

"I don't think I can be truly happy unless I have more passwords."

"What happened to the good old days when people just breached contracts?'

"This 'digital revolution' - can we muscle in on that?"

'I have your MRI results. Half your brain is clogged with passwords and the other half is clogged with user names.'

Beware of Sophisticated, Hard to Spot, Email Scams,

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

"Well the good news is that the system is completely secure,no one can get into it...and the bad news...It's because it's crashed!"

'That's odd, that site verified my age by having me type in all my credit card information.'

Your country needs YOUR personal data!

'Encryption. You must be joking. It took me six months just to learn how to email.'

Alas, Hansel and Gretel had left a digital trail...

'The staff are healthy enough, it's the computers that keep getting a virus!'

'Don't open that attachment!'

Peep-A-Boo Spyware: 'Your Privacy is Our Eminent Domain!'

'The virus is that bad, huh?'

"To retrieve password: Please answer your secret question, which is, 'what is your password?' hahahaha!"

"You're asking for some pretty detailed information. Have your hackers gotten more demanding?"

"You have reached technical support...your call is important to us so please stay on the line..."

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

'Rubbing it no longer produces a genie. Now you need a username, password and an unreadable CAPTCHA.'

Proof of Being Human

Computer Virus

Man zips up a computer.

America's Funniest Encrypted Passwords

"It used to be that if you worried about unseen forces you were considered paranoid. Now you're a security expert."

'Did you understand ANY of that?'

'Since that attempted 'watering hole' cyber attack we've been told to be hyper-vigilant!'

"My new antivirus software makes my computer self destruct if someone tries to hack into it. I mistakenly hit the wrong key when typing in my password."

'Our firewall barely protects our content.'

Internet fraud.

"I hope the people who hacked Sony don't get a hold of my recipe for Tuna Ole."

'This is Mr. Uhmatungha, he knows how to protect computers from even the worst hacker and virus attacks.'

Valley of the Forgotten Passwords.

Big Brother.

Armed Forces: We are need in of computer hackers to handle our cyber warfare defenses.