Cyber Security Analyst Gifts

"We found the hacker who broke into our system - and now he's our director of security."

"I don't get this. I know that you're a computer hacker and must have done many bad things. But your record is completely clean!"

"After we read every e-mail ever written, I'm gonna start on that new Dan Brown novel."

"Sorry kid, but making a list of who's been naughty or nice, amounts to cyber-stalking these days."

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

The Anti-Agent

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

Olivia just hacked into the boy scouts' site and sold them 30,000 boxes of cookies.

'Who changed the password to 'arf'?'

"Always remember, sweetheart, that when the service is free, YOU'RE the product!"

"My hackers just collapsed your country's economy."

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

"Just give me your wallet. Trust me, you do not want to deal with my misplaced sense of entitlement."

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

'We subpoenaed all of 'Mr. Big's' electronic messages. They're in morse code.'

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

'Now that everyone's street is online, we're mapping interiors.'

Minority Report

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

"No, Mother, I don't think Julian Assange is going to leak your recipe for fruitcake."

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

A Little Extra

"Don't deny it. You only wanted me for my metadata."