Cyber Strategist Pillows

"You all know General Petersen from I.T."

'I've decided to centralize my operations. Everything will be in my ipad.'

'Bad news, sir -- there's a leak in our think tank!'

"I can always tell when Philip is working on family finances. A 'cursor' appears on both sides of the computer screen."

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

Eldrow

Obsession with the Internet.

'Irwin graduates from an online course today.'

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

'You're good with people. Just tell him to go fuck himself.'

'Jeff is a tackle on his online college football team.'

'See here, Flanigan ? what's this I hear about you going over my head to the computer?'

"To be clear you are willing to labor under misconceptions?"

"Get used to verifications. In the court of the internet, you are presumed a robot until proven otherwise."

See? Whenever he's mad at me, he turns off his Touch ID sensor.

"Hack back with all you've got!"

"Oh, and add a couple of intentional typos to my weekly email update...I want to appear warm and authentic!!"

These young people need everything spelled out to them! I miss the old days, when a wink was a wink, and a nod was a nod.

'Have your people facebook my people.'

'There you go again - trying to solve my problems. I am not asking you to do that. I just want you to listen to me.'

"I'm recommending more video games. I'm worried about his hand eye coordination."

"Tell me when it's all cyber warfare, and I'll enlist!"

Cyberwarfare

"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."

"You kids are losing your ability to communicate person-to-person...so we're having a good old-fashioned family talk!"

The Atomium Bombs

'Computer editing software with an obnoxious ego.' 'Look, you really don't want to say that, do you?'

After paying the IT consultants we didn't have enough left for proper laptops!

"According to our eye tracking studies,either nobody is looking at the content on our site, or all the participants have lazy eye."

'Technology is wonderful. It makes your people so much easier to use.'

Rodin, the surfer.

"Holding an open contest on social media and announcing the winner may not be the most secure way to pick a password."

"Hi, I designed this Sim Game and I'm checking on staff morale."

'Sales are down. We tried to make the latest version, of our best selling software, foolproof. Apparently, someone was making better fools.'

"Since you became a management consultant we don't seem to speak sense any more."