Cybercrime Strategist Pillows

"There's nothing left. He made sure all his accounts were hacked."

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

'Who changed the password to 'arf'?'

"Always remember, sweetheart, that when the service is free, YOU'RE the product!"

"My hackers just collapsed your country's economy."

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

"It's a fantastic computer! It's so old that none of today's hackers know how to hack it!"

Internet Cafe.

"We've updated our privacy policy...it's so private we can't even tell you."

'If you'll excuse me, my car is on fire.'

Information about information about information about information.

'Airbag safety feature.'

NSA - 'Start Leakin'.'

How to create a password you can remember...

"Tell me when it's all cyber warfare, and I'll enlist!"

"That was before I found this amazing new way to earn $$$ working from home."

Robot Robber

"I'm just sitting here collecting vast amounts of metadata. And what are you up to?...Oh, I already know."

'The best way to protect your privacy is through a flood of misinformation obscuring the truth.'

"Yes, I'm a superhero. I'm not attractive, muscular or charming because I work in the 'cyber crimes' division."

Internet Shoplifting

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"What happened to the good old days when people just breached contracts?'

Data security officers run frantically out of reactive data security room, while another data officer relaxes in the predictive data security room.

'They take patient privacy so seriously around here they encrypt your name!'

"Joe, is that you? Can you really hear me? What's the password for the email?"

'If a hacker steals all my information from my health records do they keep my health problems too?'

"Information highway patrol sir. Can I see your computer driving licence?"

'Oh, we don't need your references. We got hackers for that.'

"Now that Hillary Clinton's lost her status to share classified material, all I can hack from her emails are photos of kitties and job applications."

"We've been hacked by our enemies! Is there anyone who know something about computers?"

"We don't need a digital security guard. Hackers don't actually come to our house."