Cyber Security Geek Gifts

Online vs. Offline Behaviour

The Computer Bore

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

Algorithm 'n' Blues

"I'm trying to create a hologram of myself. If I'm successful, I'll never have to attend school, go to the dentist or go anywhere else that's boring again."

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

Fenton G. Gonklemeyer, Computer Scientist - Booted Up 1928 and Crashed 2009.

"I accidentally hit 3 keys and then hit enter. CTRL + Z didn't get rid of it. Can we keep it as a pet?"

'Oh, relax - you're doing great for your age...but I am a little concerned about out computer's old operating system.'

When you said the cat was hacking down here, I assumed you meant a hairball.

'I'm afraid you've failed the Turing test.'

A Little Extra

"To retrieve password: Please answer your secret question, which is, 'what is your password?' hahahaha!"

'Kumor's responsible for all the computer passwords, so the boss had him encrypted.'

Aliens From Outer Space Come in Many Shapes

"The new computer is great, but we can't get rid of the old one. It knows too much."

"These targeted ads are getting out of hand."

"Get used to verifications. In the court of the internet, you are presumed a robot until proven otherwise."

"I think earth's antivirus software expired."

A caveman rubs two sticks together and gets a computer.

'Mommy -- Jimmy just wrote his first computer virus!'

"I think retrieving the info from that harddrive might be a little tricky."

"Hackers, Sire! They've broken through our firewall."

Knights of the Square Table.

'What a day! Caught between a Wiki leak and a document dump.'

"In my trashcan again, eh?"

'Since PRISM, nothing is 'off the record' any more.'

"Are you sure you updated the anti-virus software?"

"Honey, our pop-up blocker stopped working again."

'There is nothing physically wrong. It needs a psychiatrist.'