Cyber Security Gifts

"You think they all look like security risks."

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

Privacy Forum

America's Funniest Encrypted Passwords

'I'm not being bullied...it's from my boss.'

"To prove I'm human, I check the box. It still won't let me in."

"Technology has changed criminals these days. Instead of taking my money and credit cards, the mugger made me give him my online passwords."

"'Woof-woof'? That's your idea of a secure password?"

"Sometimes I regret using his name as my password - every time I forget it, I have to call him something new."

"Yes, I'm a superhero. I'm not attractive, muscular or charming because I work in the 'cyber crimes' division."

"Sorry kid, but making a list of who's been naughty or nice, amounts to cyber-stalking these days."

"My phone has two step authorization. Facial and Backside recognition"

"My mom's always telling me to change my underwear and my passwords."

"We may have to live outside for a while. I forgot the password to our smarthome."

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

The Anti-Agent

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

'Who changed the password to 'arf'?'

"Always remember, sweetheart, that when the service is free, YOU'RE the product!"

"My hackers just collapsed your country's economy."

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

'We subpoenaed all of 'Mr. Big's' electronic messages. They're in morse code.'

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

"It's so cute when the boss brings his son to work and pretends to let him help out!"

"No, Mother, I don't think Julian Assange is going to leak your recipe for fruitcake."

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."