Cv Sorter Gifts

HR worker wading through CV's.

Interdisciplinary studies.

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

"I see by your resume that you're having trouble finding work because you pad your resume."

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

'I see from your C. V. that you're my son...'

'He's just come back from another management training course.'

Bathroom shelf full of clocks and pills.

"Yes, I suppose attention seeking may be considered by some as an asset, but frankly we need more than that."

"In your CV under 'experience' all you've written is 'YIPEE!'."

'Interesting resume, would you mind if I kept it overnight? I'd like to take it home with me...and scare the living daylight out of my kids.'

'Very impressive, but is there anything you can't do?'

'Well, do you want to sign up or not?' - 'Um...yes and no.'

Florida Golf.

"A vibrant imagination is an excellent quality for the job...but not the CV."

'My wife doesn't appreciate that I push the envelope every day.'

30th Birthday - Doctors aren't like policemen.. they don't grow younger, they just age faster.

"Baxter, I'm doing an online course in delegating and I want you to sit the exam for me."

In Tray Out Tray Suspicious Tray

'Well, I am only human!' (Human Resources)

"Do you have any other strengths?"

'Tolerance...Zero Tolerance'

"My last job was as a mine interpreter...I would go to a park and describe what the mime was trying to convey."

politically correct czar: 'Popular...Elitist'

'I'm sure you are proud of being a world record holder. But having 7,935 different employers in one month isn't something I'd put on my resume.'

'Great Books' 'Good Books' 'Trash'

Hearts oh his countrymen: G. Washington...FIRST...ETC

"Yes, I do all my shopping online. How did you know?"

"Your resume states you spent four years as a hostage. May we have permission to contact your captors?"

'Welcome to the interview for our Post-Doc position, I hope you've brought your publication list...'

"Interesting CV, we haven't had anyone with a qualification in 'being really good at stuff' before."

"The 10-week course costs $600 and takes an hour and a half to complete."

Useful and Useless Screws

"A very impressive resume, I confess I didn't realise there was a Nobel prize for 'being the best at computers and all that stuff'."

Flower Arranging.