Customs Inspection Gifts

Smug Lur Transport. It was just a hunch.

UK border controls relaxed.

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

Collies Without Borders

Vaccination Passport

"...We've traced your lineage all the way back to a 15th-century East European Count."

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

'French hypermarket' ' 5 English or less' till

"It only made sense for us to finally merge."

"Okay, lets see what we have here."

IRS Audit Section

"Don't worry. If we're too late, we can always catch the secondary screening."

'Due to recent staff cut-backs and consolidations, I'll be handling your death AND your taxes this year!'

"Other folks have to pay taxes, too, Mr. Herndon, so would you please spare us the dramatics!"

'Hang on, I've just found another one. It must've fallen down behind the coffee machine.'

'He's trying to persuade the Inland Revenue that it's a tax haven.'

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

IRS agent to professor scrutinizing tax return under microscope: 'Still looking for that tax loophole, professor?'

"Office of quality assurance"

Tax Collector

"His name? It's 'Reggie the Drug-Sniffing Dog.'"

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

"Well, if it's a fairy story you want, here's a good one that arrived at the office today."

'Will you bring in Mr.Harris' file - you'll find it under 'U' for unbelievable.'

'I have nothing to declare... Okay, I liked Maui better.'

"What makes you think this could be a suspect package?"

'Anything to declare?'

'I know a lot of folks get us confused, but I'm actually taxes!'

'The Buck (after taxes) Stops Here.'

"I now represent both death and taxes."

'Tax inspector: In. Out. Suicide notes.'

"It's marzipan pigs."

'Please help me! Every payday, I get robbed some gangsters called 'Fiscal Authority'!