Customer Engagement Gifts

Target your customer.

A Puppet Named Juan

Networking

"Remember Mr. Cockbundle is not just a 'customer', he is an important source of valuable and readily marketable data."

'Well, I must say I never thought team-building exercises could be such fun.'

Direct Marketing...

Arizona In Black

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

'It's one of our new technology rings, it allows you to download karats.'

'I've been to better motivational seminars.'

'I'll take the one on the right.'

'They're just a few bored students with some vague ideology. They'll be gone and forgotten in no time.'

"More?"

Suggestion box: 'Build a bigger Complaints box'.

Follow God On Twitter

'Are these mushrooms or toadstools? And why are you holding a stomach pump?.'

"We're still trying to sort out the details."

Continental Breakfast...$2.99: 'What continent is THIS supposed to represent?'

Policing the Police

"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may send the bride a kiss emoji."

"Our latest survey shows our customers basically want just three things: prompt service, and apology when mistakes occur and to be treated politely..."

Suggestion box paper shredder.

"Now do you believe me that your snoring wakes up the whole neighborhood?"

Healthy and happy workers are productive workers!

'Our definition of a 'bargain' is right there in the small print.'

"So what else can we get our customers to do online themselves and charge them for it?"

"... Wine list? No, we don't have a wine list! Perhaps I can get sir something from the vending machine?"

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

"Read a little about it"

Waiter, what's this photograph of Jeff Goldblum doing in my soup? He starred in the remake of "The Fly." Personally, I prefer Al (David) Hedison in the original.

'I just don't get it. The new motivational posters aren't helping at all!'

'I find the best way to stop students from always talking to each other in class, is to keep asking questions. Then they have nothing to say.'

Mums at play group.

'Hargreaves - I understand you have an idea for improving staff morale?'

"My family clapped louder than your family!"