Cushion Warrior Gifts

The sofa freshly made up...

Check your universal remote control at the door.

PROBLEM AREAS

Girl in Yellow Jumper

"My pillow mania got out of control so I'm limiting myself to just one at a time."

Duel in a wheelchair.

"So what brings you in today?"

'This game is going to be a character-building experience.'

Overdoing it.

'I'll calk that hole as soon as the siege is over.'

'I'm old, bald and fat, but at least I'm not boring!'

'Bill remembers where he was everybody died.'

Before the accident? John was a truck driver.

Wheelchair Basketball

'It's good news - the car can be repaired'

"You know your dog better than I do."

Physiotherapist tells Humpty Dumpty: 'OK, you've had a great fall, but we'll have you back on that wall in no time.'

'Both benches have emptied, and now the brawl is spreading to the spectators!'

You know you're getting old when....

"My chronic condition has been pestering me every single day for the past six months. I'm a lifelong quitter so its persistence is troubling me."

'... No, I'm sorry, the doctor can't see you right now. Today's his prior authorization day.'

'Hey! Roll a mile in my shoes!'

'I'm afraid neither your insurance nor your immune system will cover it.'

"And this was before you plumped the cushions, or after?"

Heaven: Disabled Access

Professor Lars P. Olafson. Inventor of the scatter cushion.

"Ugh. My hip hurts, my lower back aches, and my wrist is killing me. Stupid yoga!"

'The transplant went okay, but your insurance company is rejecting the bill.'

"A few more decorative pillow and I won't have to make the bed."

'You're lucky. Some people don't look good wearing dirt.'

Artist's methods of guarding his paintings

'Stop complaining...at least we get a choice!'

'I can't remember for the life of me why I came upstairs.'

A king in a wheelchair throne