Cushion Explorer Gifts

'Nothing, thanks - we've just come in to check under the cushions.'

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

"It's wonderful to be away from the rat race. So, what happened on 'CSI: Miami' last night?"

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

"He is walking from 'Lands end to John'o'Groats', virtually."

"My pillow mania got out of control so I'm limiting myself to just one at a time."

The sofa freshly made up...

"Damn, I forgot to pack a jumper."

'I never said it was the comfy wear...I said it was the comfy look!'

Magazine stand in middle of the desert.

"No, we’re not lost, Claire. And yes, I have seen ‘Deliverance’!"

This is called "The Ballad of a Self-Taught Guitarist."

"Our cautions to the wind dear?.. I said let's throw our CAUTIONS to the wind."

How long have you let this unhealthy obsession with family and friends interfere with your celebrity-watching?

Now that we're too old to migrate, we still travel, but locally. What an amazing region we live in!

'It's topped with things I found under my sofa cushions.'

Closet.

"You know your dog better than I do."

You know you're getting old when....

Welcome to the North Pole

Elderly Tarzan...

'I found a whole bunch of worms in the wheel wells!'

Punk Rock

The Modern Tourist

"Sorry mate - I can't come to the pub after the match because I've got to embarrass myself filming an advert for moisturiser."

'Now, are you looking for a closet or something under a bed?'

Stout Cortez and Some Wild Surmises

Man in carriage waiting for shopping wife

'So far I haven't seen a thing.'

Man and TV

Professor Lars P. Olafson. Inventor of the scatter cushion.

Undiscovered in 1492, Undiscovered in 1776, Undiscovered in 1969

"And this was before you plumped the cushions, or after?"

Finding yourself

TV Remote control user is zapped by his telly