Curriculum Memer Gifts

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

'City Traders - The Complete Menagerie'

'The reason the core curriculum seems so ambiguous is that we dot really have a core curriculum.'

"...how would you rate me on a scale of nine to ten?"

"Does our improvement really need to be so continuous?"

"Are you kids going to behave, or do I have to put my foot down?!"

"Thank you for 30 years of teaching service. Now you have 5 minutes to turn in your keys, I.D. card, empty your desk and be escorted out."

'That's o.k., Dugan - 'why do I even bother?' was a rhetorical question.'

'I was going to teach them the meaning of life ... but it wasn't on the test.'

"I said 'I quit'. Nobody listens to me any more."

'Now, 'ol doc, he'd have wrapped 'er the other way.'

'You must be the new hire. Welcome aboard. Here's our prepackaged curriculum. If time permits, encourage critical thinking.'

"Should I refer to it as 'Common Core'?"

'How come you're always trying to teach me things I don't want to know.'

"Poison ivy? No, I said you have a poison IV. Honestly, I have no idea why we keep that stuff right next to the medicine."

Phrenology head filled with National Curriculum instead of real knowledge.

Conservative Curriculum

"I hope they're not fake commandments!"

"What is the battle cry for homeschoolers?" Kids: "Go Home!"

"Are you concerned about the increase in artificial intelligence?"

'He was a lifelong knee-jerk liberal until he got knee replacement surgery.'

'...And, to expand our food animal practice curriculum,...

I just can't take it anymore!

"First day of school and you've already got problem students?"

'My instincts and intuitions are on opposing sides on this schedule.'

"Why wasn't the Tulsa Black Wall Street Massacre in the U.S. history books?"

'I look forward to my first year as a teacher. I wrote lesson plans, attended in-service workshops, and decorated my classroom. Preparation is half the victory. It's the other half that scares me.'

'I think I use the Internet too much. I find myself writing 'com' after each period.'

'Okay kids, this is the new timetable.'

'The great tree of knowledge in his discipline was just pulled out by the roots.'

"Just once I'd like to get past the War of 1812 by spring vacation."

Casualty

Critical Thinking....

"I wish they'd educate us with something besides school."