Currency Jokester Pillows

Man inflating a Sterling pound sign

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

'We don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's a tax deduction.'

"Let's vote. All those in favour of flying to Switzerland, withdrawing our secret bank account and splitting?"

"We can't just pluck figures out of the air any more. . . We use a bucket."

"Goodbye cruel world."

"Today, the yen shot up on news it is spelled differently from the 'Yuan'."

'You call it a beer belly, I prefer to think of it as a lump sum settlement of liquid assets.'

"Well, if I was ambitious, we'd have a nice house and more money, but I'd never be around."

'Slaug-ter house? I wonder what that is. C'mon, I'll race you!'

"We'll double our chances of recovery if we buy two lottery tickets."

"Tag! Your salary's frozen."

"We try to inject a little humor in our statements, but you should take them seriously."

'I just asked to see the annual figures...'

"I'm afraid we don't offer student loans to elementary school pupils."

"...And when the world economy collapses, we all stand up and take over! Agreed?"

It's a nice apartment but I don't want to pay my share of the national debt for rent.

Some cultures use fish as money. 'Got change for a halibut?' 'Sure! Minnows OK?

Zero interest CDs! Why pay taxes?

'Again. . . why are we expelling these two?'

"Someplace where the currency has already melted down."

"If a higher interest rate is a sign of a stronger economy, you must think I'm golden."

"They call the dollar stable and you know what's in the stable."

'I'm with the I.R.S. you had better report this as income.'

Best friends: death and taxes.

'Here's a twenty. Go nuts.'