Curious Correspondent Gifts

'Dear Abby: I continually find myself asking for advice from complete strangers. Please help.'

"You say it all the time, so I climbed every tree to prove it. You were right, money doesn't grow on trees."

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

"It's felt to be his most thought provoking work."

Do Guns Kill?

"Yes, that's the tree with all the squirrels from yesterday. And no, I don't know where they are today."

'Academic freedom doesn't mean you're free not to study.'

Young ladies ponder the relationship of a man with a young boy

Idle parts

'Thank goodness for clumsy children: A spilt ice-cream!'

'According to the latest poll, 64% of the public don't pay any attention to polls...'

"Do I need to know this stuff to get into medical school?"

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

"He's at that awkward age...he knows just enough about computers to really screw them up."

Sex Section in the Library

The Curious George pop-down book

The Farmer Sutra.

The New York Times Blog Review.

'Mummy, what's a daddy one of those called?'

Stonehenge Books

"Where's your section of books that tell you simple things you already know?"

"Jim had to know what happens when you turn off your computer while it's updating."

God hounded by the media.

'Let's arbitrate.'

Minimalism exhibition...

"If you want me to ask him that you'll have to wait until after the watershed."

"It looks like fecal transplants may do us in."

"So how does New York stack up against Uzbekistan?"

'Mr. Watson?.. Alexander Graham Bell here. I'm a first-time caller...'

Alice Through the Looking Glass - Alice Meets Tweedledum and Tweedledee.

"You've got a vow of silence? How interesting! Tell me all about that!"

'But what is a recession, Father?'

Aliens man telephone store named ET&T Phones.