Cultural Humor Fans Gifts

Amish Time-Out

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

'Yes, all at once!'

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

"I can never remember - do these go in garbage or compost?"

Raised by Dogs

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Hon, I'm home!'

'We found you in a cabbage!'

Tequila Mockingbird

"Fangul." Italian sausage.

'NO, it DOESN'T come on DISC!'

"Maybe I'm aiming too high...maybe 'saving for a cool car' is too hard."

"Pumpkin spice has been very good to me."

Government survey into the effects of haggis throwing in Ethiopia.

'Guess who's teething?'

"I'm sorry, but your child just isn't very sharp. But don't worry. It's perfectly natural."

"Sorry, coffee is delivered by a union shop and you banned all things union."

'Henry, cut that out.'

'You've made a breakthrough in FINANCIAL research?', 'Yep! - I split the ATM!'

"Relax, he could just be looking for fun."

The Scottish Lawn

Sure, snoring is a big issue at our house too: you've seen the size of my dad's nose...

Beer Lunch

"When you said we were going to push the boat out tonight, I thought you meant we were going to a fancy restaurant!"

Under New Mismanagement

"When did this game get started?"

"We don't have knock-knock jokes on Christmas."

"What?!"

'Hi! I'm a freshman -- when do I get corrupted?'

"Oh you kids and that cursed painting in the closet keep me young."

"Hey, Zorro! You forgot your mask."

Make your own bottled water.