Cultural Humor Fans Pillows

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

'Yes, all at once!'

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

Raised by Dogs

"I can never remember - do these go in garbage or compost?"

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Hon, I'm home!'

'We found you in a cabbage!'

Tequila Mockingbird

"Fangul." Italian sausage.

'NO, it DOESN'T come on DISC!'

"Pumpkin spice has been very good to me."

'Guess who's teething?'

Government survey into the effects of haggis throwing in Ethiopia.

"I'm sorry, but your child just isn't very sharp. But don't worry. It's perfectly natural."

The Scottish Lawn

"Sorry, coffee is delivered by a union shop and you banned all things union."

'Henry, cut that out.'

"Relax, he could just be looking for fun."

'You've made a breakthrough in FINANCIAL research?', 'Yep! - I split the ATM!'

Sure, snoring is a big issue at our house too: you've seen the size of my dad's nose...

"When did this game get started?"

"When you said we were going to push the boat out tonight, I thought you meant we were going to a fancy restaurant!"

"What?!"

"Oh you kids and that cursed painting in the closet keep me young."

Beer Lunch

'Hi! I'm a freshman -- when do I get corrupted?'

Under New Mismanagement

"We don't have knock-knock jokes on Christmas."

Make your own bottled water.

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