Culinary Scientist Gifts

"No, I'm not the waiter. I'm the genetic engineer. How would you like your lamb?"

Under strict laboratory conditions, research concludes,that in spite of being watched, pots do eventually boil.

'Hard or soft science?'

'Cooking, it's rocket science...'

"Give my compliments to the Biotech industry"

'Care to join me? I'm making lunch.'

'Once once we figure out how to cure them of what they died from, we'll thaw them out and bring them back to life.'

"Needs a pinch of salt."

Bakery Research & Development. You've come up with a paranormal cookie? It's called "Oreo 51"!

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

"You sure you don't want any Pi?"

If Einstein had worked in Fast Food

'If that's the way he feels about chemistry, there's no harm done.'

'I have to agree -- the value of pie goes on indefinitely.'

Einstein tests his pasta-antipasto theory.

Culinary surgery.

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"States of tofu"

"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

6 Brothers Falafel

"You're the lid to my pot."

"Rump roast?"

'He's trying to put some magic into my recipes.'

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

Cookbooks

Picking pastries.

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"