Culinary Misadventures Gifts

'How can anything this bad be fattening?.'

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

"Chomp... Chomp... Curry Tree..."

"I envy you, but my dietary requirements make it difficult for me to travel..."

When the ship needed to go faster than Warp Speed, the crew ate lots of pungent beans.

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

"And then, when I feel like a rum punch and breaded shrimp, I can just swim to Tony’s Trattoria."

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

"It's time you took a vacation, John. I said to 'marinate'... not 'palpate' the liver!"

Man's cooking explodes.

All-Day Breakfast

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

"The Halloween Special is the pork and kraut. It'll come back and haunt you."

'Who ordered the shark?.' '

Oil Spill: 'Oh dear! That was the last of our extra virgin.'

'I have a bad feeling about this place, Watson... and I smell a rat!'

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

The Family Joules: Part 14

A short-order cook gets sucked into the exhaust vent over the grill.

'You made me jump,'

'Snob, he won't eat domestic slugs, just imports.'

"And how is the 'medium' salmon you had me overcook?!"

Lunch-Hour Highlights

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

'Yes, all our flambe dishes come with injury, liability insurance.'

I won! I finished my pizza first! Want to make it two out of three?

Martian restaurant and take away

"Just keep your eyes closed - it'll only upset you."

'My expense account isn't what it used to be. So for lunch I'm taking you fishing, and we'll eat what we catch.'

"The portions here are so small, thank goodness there's a food bank around the corner."

'Jam roly-poly, treacle tart, ice cream... We're in luck, it's a dessert island.'

Anton Mosimann