Culinary Misadventures T-Shirts

'How can anything this bad be fattening?.'

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

"Chomp... Chomp... Curry Tree..."

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

"And then, when I feel like a rum punch and breaded shrimp, I can just swim to Tony’s Trattoria."

"I envy you, but my dietary requirements make it difficult for me to travel..."

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

"It's time you took a vacation, John. I said to 'marinate'... not 'palpate' the liver!"

Man's cooking explodes.

All-Day Breakfast

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

'Who ordered the shark?.' '

"The Halloween Special is the pork and kraut. It'll come back and haunt you."

Oil Spill: 'Oh dear! That was the last of our extra virgin.'

'I have a bad feeling about this place, Watson... and I smell a rat!'

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

'Snob, he won't eat domestic slugs, just imports.'

A short-order cook gets sucked into the exhaust vent over the grill.

'You made me jump,'

"And how is the 'medium' salmon you had me overcook?!"

Lunch-Hour Highlights

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

'Yes, all our flambe dishes come with injury, liability insurance.'

Martian restaurant and take away

'My expense account isn't what it used to be. So for lunch I'm taking you fishing, and we'll eat what we catch.'

'Jam roly-poly, treacle tart, ice cream... We're in luck, it's a dessert island.'

"The portions here are so small, thank goodness there's a food bank around the corner."

Anton Mosimann

"I heard this dumpster got a bad review, but we'll try it out anyhow."