Culinary Catastrophe Lover Gifts

'Let's sit in front of the fire.'

'I'll never look at a cheese omelette ever again!'

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

Is that pancake ready yet?

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

'Oh, hi!... yes, we have another emergency... make it the usual, and you know the address!'

"Oh -- just scrape it off."

"My dad ate my homework."

'Believe it or not you're our greatest liability Jones!'

"I'm here to fix the lasagne."

"Maybe we were wrong to hire him just because he looks good in paper."

'Believe it or not you're our greatest liability Jones!'

"Are you still waiting for the pancake to come down?"

"I've burnt the roast...Turn down the restaurant lighting a touch!"

"What are you looking up, recipes for disaster?"

"The fire department ruined dinner."

Killer Apple Pie Threatens Earth.

'Well, lucky you! The chef informs me that his breakfast special today is blackened scrambled eggs!'

"Well it's either my dinner or my shirt."

"Oh my god- the salad's on fire!"

'Should my souffle blow the oven door off?'

"The chef's having a tough day, what with coroners and such."

'What do you mean, send out for pizza? This is pizza!'

Smelly fish.

'Jeeves, you've made this soup taste like absolute s**t! Well done!'

"Careful, I'm spilling your shrimp bisque all over the place."

Murphy's Slaw.

'What d'you mean,Doris-you,ve burnt OUR dinner,and hers NEXT door,and hers NEXT door again and...?'

Sandwich Fail

Smoke gets in your eyes.

"I'd say another twenty minutes before plating. We'll know once the swearing gets really desperate."

'We'll have to eat out tonight - the meatloaf turned on me.'