Culinary Camera Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Ooh, that looks delicious! Does it photograph well?"

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

I put a picture of my lunch on Facebook, and nobody hit "like." Who doesn't like Slim Jims and beer?

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

Baker Romance

"It's smells so good, but why do you have to wait so long?!"

'I was in the catering corps.'

Restaurant Chef with book titled: 'Introduction To Cooking'.

"What's happened to Quiche?"

"Room for dessert, folks?"

Feast

The Perfect Foil

"Excuse me, but could you ask the chef to make this a little more photogenic?"

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

"This deserves an Instagram photo. Would you mind taking a picture of someone washing the dishes when I'm done?"

"I’ll have something for you as soon as Table Seven sees the entrée prices."

Great moments in 'Haute Cuisine'. . . America gives the world the Donut Sandwich.

Cookery Lesson.

Doctor uses thermometer to check chicken.

"May I recommend our Seared Filet with Lobster Cream Sauce? It's very photogenic."

Avocado Timeline

'Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!' 'That's not soup! It's gumbo.'

The perfect man

"My instagram feed is basically people, dog food, and tennis balls."