Cry Whisperer Gifts

"You have the right to remain silent, anytime you cry can be used against you...."

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

"Is this Randy the Love Doctor?"

Computer Expert

"They’re real."

Where 'Pastor'-ized Milk Comes From...

He doesn't howl at the moon. He prefers to howl into the void.

"You need to stop bottling it up."

Pull the udder one

Mother's Love

Mother threatening to gag her baby.

"We would like to be genetically modified to taste like Brussels sprouts."

'Well look, here come the hackers!'

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

"He's from IT. All I did was tell him I thought he was doing a great job... and he fainted in shock!"

We come in pieces!

'That cloud doesn't look like a horse to me, but if I import it into Photoshop...'

"You're wondering why I've called you here."

'Mama! Aliens.'

'We'll have him back on his feet and under yours in no time!'

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

Teacher getting the childrens attention by pretending to be on television.

"Hey, you guys, don't you remember? The big word here is 'compromise.' "

'The first day on the job was not going well for Al...'

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

"Tell the truth, Ezra. Does it look like he's being a more effective parent than me?"

Sorry, I thought you said you wanted to see 'Parrot Normal Activity'

"Do we have to use our inside voices through clenched teeth like you, Ms. Baker?"

'Things just haven't been the same around here since people starting saving files in the cloud.'

''Normal' seems too much to shoot for ... but maybe I can keep you out of the nuthouse.'

'There's a teddy and a pony... and that one looks like medulla oblongata!'

Having It All

"I made my first million tech consulting explaining the cloud to clients."