Cruise Planner Gifts

Snooze Cruise

Santa Claus's Mail

Tourists

Packed boats of families on a seaside holidays

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

'Next year I'm hiring a tank!'

'Are we broke yet?'

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

An alleyway leads to a scenic area.

"The best beaches are Santa Cruz, Hossegor, Ericeira, The Gold Coast, Barbados, Sennen Cove, Oahu and Bali son: They're full of surfers..."

BIG BOOK OF CAMPER VAN NAMES

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

"Two of every known creature on the planet and you forgot the pooper-scooper?"

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

'My secret? Stay away from Halloween candy.'

"Actually, I hear my boss. I'm on a working vacation."

"Don't blame me, you're the one who suggested an island-hopping holiday!"

Wizard of Oz - repeat fees

North Pole twinned with Amazon

'Caution Speed Bump Ahead.'

"I think I found a location for our vacation."

'Now that hunting season is over, I'd suggest separate vacations.'

'You're going on a long journey. Have you got an OAP's bus pass?'

Vacation Time: Hither, Thither, Yon.

Tolls: Must have exact change and tails up.

"If we'd gone South for the winter, we'd be back by now."

"It looks brighter over there!"

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

"I'm making a list of everything we have to do before we go away so we can freak out in some kind of order."

You have a major fiasco at 10:30, followed by a shocking scandal at 2:15.